Trevor & I met when I was in college at LMC. I was in two classes with his best friend, Craig. (He's on the left) So Craig & I became friends, and one day Craig was like, "Hey, want to hang out with my friend Trevor?" And I was like, "Sure!" And the rest was history. Although we were dating other people at the time, there was something about Trevor that always stood out to me; we had some sort of connection that I can't explain. Sooner or later we became best friends. We talked every day and hung out almost every day. I came to him with all my problems and he always made me feel better. We could talk about ANYTHING, he knew more about me than my best friend and my boyfriend both. Because he never judged me, and telling him my problems actually made me feel better instead of worse, which was the case with a lot of my friends. I had this huge crush on him that I lied to myself and everyone else about, because he was dating somebody else and so was I. I was content to just be his best friend. (But I did admit that he was reaaaaally cute) We promised we'd never stop talking, even though I had plans to move away.
We were still at the point where we were just best friends. We'd hardly hung out alone before, but now we started to. We did cute things that we tried to pass off as just 'friend' things, like going on picnics and to the movies and park together. One night we went to the beach at dark, and swam in the lake. I caught myself on more than one occassion staring at Trevor and thinking about how my life could be if he were a bigger part of it. But I thought - "Pfft, Clare, get a hold of yourself. Trevor doesn't like you like that, you're just friends. Don't fall in too deep." But there was a nagging feeling in the back of my mind that I loved Trevor more than just a best friend kind of love. But since I didn't think he liked me back, I couldn't give in to that feeling; I'd been through enough heartache in the past few months to last me a while.
One day last year, August 2nd, Trevor invited me to hang out with him at his grandparents' house. They had a pool and they would be gone all day working, so we could hang out there for a while and swim. Of course I agreed. It was a great day in the sun, his grandparents have a beautiful backyard and we spent a lot of time in the pool or hanging out on the deck, or walking around by the flowers. I did a lot of thinking. All the sudden something came to me, like I got smacked right in the middle of the forehead. "I'm in love with Trevor." I realized. "And he's in love with me!" It was like everything changed from this point on. I knew, beyond the shadow of a doubt, that everything I had felt and ignored previously was true. That Trevor & I could be together, and could have an amazing, happy, blissful relationship. I stopped lying to myself. And I stopped lying to Trevor, too.Later that night we were together, just hanging out and listening to some music. There came that point in the beginning of every relationship, where you stare at each other awkwardly for a while. Another one of my convictions with this relationship was that I would NOT say I love you before I really, truly, 100% for sure meant it. But earlier that day I realized that without a shadow of a doubt, I loved Trevor. So as we stared at eachother, somehow I managed to get the words out. "I love you." came out, barely above a whisper. "Clare," he said to me, "I've loved you for a long time."
Trevor & I didn't have an official start to our relationship, there was never that point where he asked "Will you be my girlfriend?" We started going on dates way before we called them dates, so when we looked back on our relationship wondering when our anniversary would be, the day everything became clear between us seemed like the best choice. :)
It's been a whole year since that day, and each day has been better than the last. Trevor is the best boyfriend I could ever ask for, and our relationship makes me a better, stronger, and happier person. Sure, we disagree sometimes, but the important thing is that we always come to a compromise. We put the other person ahead of ourselves, we put their happiness first. I love him more every single day.So, Trevor, if you're reading this. Thank you for being so nice to me. Thank you for always being there for me, thank you for always listening and caring. Thank you for giving me the motivation to be the best me I possibly can be. Thank you for making me so happy, every day of my life. Thank you for being my best friend!
Happy anniversary. <3 I love you!
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